Friday, October 26, 2007

Kashi "Good Friends" Cereal

Weigh-In: 247.8

So I had some of this cereal this morning, Kashi "Good Friends"

As I'm sitting there enjoying my breakfast I take a look at the box.

I felt that this cereal was really making a statement. Here we have two women of obvious different ethnic backgrounds, who are smiling over a box of cereal. If I could show you the back of the box you'd see an Asian woman, an Asian baby, and other people of varying backgrounds.

They seem to be saying, "Look at me! I'm a black woman who has this good friend who is white, and we LOVE our Good Friends cereal!"

I put the box down and knew that I was engaging in something on the very cutting edge of society. Not only do I have multi-cultured friends, but I eat lots of fiber with them.

I look around my desk while eating the cereal. I see nothing short of a black man, two Asian men, a white woman, an Indian woman, and one guy from New Jersey.

I'm thinking to myself, "YEAH! I'm multi cultural, and look at this awesome cereal! It tastes good AND promotes diversity!"

These two smiling women on the box are proud of our diversity, and they show it with a smile.

Then it hit me. "Wait a minute..."

"I have to go to the bathroom....RIGHT NOW!"

In fact, I wasn't even sure if I was going to make it to the bathroom. This all came out of nowhere.

I'm pretty sure I knocked over an Asian woman and an Indian man in my "carefully orchestrated so as not to have an accident" speed walk to the bathroom.

Luckily I made it. "Whew, that was a close one.."

Just at that moment I realized something.

Those smiling women on the box? They weren't smiling because they were happy with their own level of diversity. They probably don't even know what diversity is, let alone celebrate it.

They were smiling because they knew this cereal, which has enough fiber to cleanse the colons of an entire retirement community in a matter of minutes, was going to send you running to the bathroom like you'd not visited it after spending 4 days at Octoberfest.

Look at that box again:

They mock me still.

If you see this product on the shelf, well, you've been warned.


Kristen said...

GREAT blog! I so didn't see all that coming...

billy said...

dude, you must not eat enough fiber, it shouldn't make THAT happen!

Plus, that cereal is ONLY for Asian and African American women. NOT FOR USE BY WHITE GUYS!

Ripx180 said...

funny blog man.... they are totally laughing at you.

Sharon said...

Thanks for a good laugh on a boring Friday. Good blog.

Marcol said...

haha - funny!
So you got your detox and your lesson on diversity all in one scoop? Funny. Thanks for the laugh - sorry you almost pooped yourself :)

GeneTheK said...

Was there a prize in the box? Like perhaps a travel size Charmin?

swankywanker said...

Oh, man, thanks for letting us in on your fun. For real, I needed a good laugh. Thank you. Those bitches do look like they're hiding a sinister secret. Now we know what it is.

Bitter Clevelander said...

Funny stuff, man... I love this cereal, which may as well be named "Colon Blow," like on that SNL fake commercial. But I've always been creeped out by those two ladies. I think they're smiling because they've hidden the bodies really well.