Going All Out

I've been really active the past 4 or 5 days. I've also eaten and drank a bunch :).

Friday Morning: - 4 mile run
Friday Night: 4 Marqherita's, chips, a few french fries, the Flyers lose.

Saturday Morning: 40 mile very hilly bike ride
Saturday Night: 2 beers, way too much sushi, and Ice Cream Sandwitch and a cookie!

Sunday Morning: Bike 30 miles, eat a huge breakfast, bike another 20 miles home
Sunday Night: eat a salad, but not the healthiest of salads. The Flyers win!

So yeah, it's kinda crazy. As you can see the weight is back up to 219, and I don't know if it's water retention from all the riding/running, extra weight from all the food drinks, or just that I ate too late last night.

I'll button the eating back up this week though, and I'd be willing to bet I'm back down to 215-ish within a few days. I'm also planning some running this week since the weather wont be the best for riding.

I do feel great though. The weather was beautiful and it felt great getting all that riding in. I really like that I'm riding and running.

I really need to take some pics and compare to last year so see if I can tell if the extra ten pounds is mostly muscle or fat. I'm starting to think that 210-215 is my real ideal weight. This happens to be 10-15 pounds over what BMI says.

I still have something, and I feel good.

In case you couldn't tell I've felt a little down about myself lately. It's weird, I had this kind-of high for a few days after the half marathon. It might have even lasted a week. I felt directionless, then I didn't really do much of anything. I've already mentioned that I put on a few pounds that I'm not working on getting rid of.

In reality it's only been 3 and a half weeks since I ran 13.1, but due to doing very little since then I was starting to think I was going to have trouble running the Broad Street 10 miler that's coming up in about 2 and a half weeks.

For one, I've proven that I haven't lost much if anything, because I just got back from running 10 miles in the cold and rain, while posting a personal best time of 1:30:45.

So I'm clearly happy about that, but more importantly, I think I'm realizing that if I don't make myself do something active I don't feel well. The benefits are not just a smaller butt, but a happier life.

I really don't know if it's a physical thing, maybe chemicals that get released when you work out that make you happier, or just mental. Maybe it doesn't matter, it's just another reason that you have to stay active to stay happy, or at least I do.

I've even found that if my muscles aren't sore on a semi regular basis I start to get pissed off that I'm not working hard enough, and I get a little depressed.

Honestly I don't know how I ever survived when I was over 300 pounds and doing nothing.

I'd be interested to hear from anyone else that has experienced something like what I'm talking about and could speak to it some more.

Checking In

Just checking in.

The weight went up 2 pounds today, I assume because I had a late dinner. Aside from that eating was good yesterday. Still havent had time to do any workouts though.

I hate Mondays

The weekend was good. Got in a 25 mile hilly bike ride, ate well, watched the weight go down a bit.

This morning was a whirlwind of BS as it pertains to bill paying, working, and general first thing Monday morning annoyances.

I'm posting my weight every day on the right side of this blog to keep myself honest.

Aside from a 10 mile run I have in early May I still havent come up with any new goals.

I hate the look of this stupid blog and I'd really like to change it.

Hopefully I can get in some cario soon. Maybe I'll go for a run tonight.

I don't really have much else to add. I'm trying to do what needs to be done and biding my time until we have a nice sunny day that is also warm.

This is a pretty lame post, but hey, at least I posted.

Uhm...what?!

Wagon? Where are you?

Damn it. I hate to post this, but I've fallen off the wagon and it's time to come clean. 3 weeks ago tomorrow I ran a half marathon. What have I done since then? Ate a lot of crap. Ran a few miles a few times (maybe 3 times total), lifted one day a week, and then ate some more. I drank a bit too. I over ate a few times. I didn't weigh myself much, going a few weeks without doing so.

Where am I now? I weigh 222 this morning. Holy crap! That's 20 pounds above my lowest average ever. It hurts. I did it.

I have to say, BMI says that based on my height and build, i should be 199. I don't want to be 199 because if I was I'd have not much muscle on my frame. There's just no way. What I'd like to get back to, albeit with less fat and more muscle is about 208-210. So I have 12 pounds to lose.

I do know that I've gained muscle, both in my legs and upper body. I can bench almost double what I could a year ago when I was 202, and I wear the same size waist jeans, however they got tight in the thighs. I ran a LOT over the winter and I think the thighs are tight because of that because I can see lots of muscle in my thighs..

But all that stuff aside I've gained some fat. There is no way I haven't.

My problem is that I set goals for myself, I meet them, then I flounder for a while after I meet my goal. I flounder goal-less. Normally I'd be OK because I'd be riding my bike, but so far this spring the weather has been crap, so I haven't been riding, I'm still eating like I'm riding, and I've put on weight. I'm pissed at myself but at the same time, HUNGRY! ALL THE TIME!

Time to get back to daily weigh-ins (I started 2 days ago), time to get some runs in if I'm not riding (I ran this morning) and time to come up with some damn fitness related goals (still working on that, although I do have a 10 mile organized run to do in a month).

I REFUSE TO GAIN ANY MORE WEIGHT.

That is all. I've come clean. I'm going to fix it. Here I go...


EDIT - FOLLOW UP:

It's now a day after I made this post, and I have a day under my belt of close to perfect eating and my weight is down 4 pounds from yesterday to 218.6. I'm still about 8 pounds above where I want to be, but I feel a little more in control now because I think the 222 weigh in that freaked me out was ne of those random high ones. That said, everything I posted above still stands, and I am on a mission to get back to where I want to be.

Mark it done!

Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm happy to announce I've met a personal goal of mine. Today I completed the SunTrust National Half Marathon in Washington DC.

I'll go into more detail about the race when I'm not about to fall asleep, but I will tell you that I did not meet my secondary goal of running the half marathon in less than 2 hours. That is because I ran it in EXACTLY 2 hours, down to the tenth of the second. You can see the results here which show me (search for Brian Payne) coming in 2062nd place out of 4150. So exactly 2 hours was my time with an overall average pace of 9:10 per mile. The second half of the race I was faster than the first which is kinda interesting...

Anyhow, I'm very happy with the results and I also know next time I'll post an even better number. But for now I'm beat, have sore knees, and need to go to bed so I'll fill you in on the details later.

-Brian

Half Marathon getting close...

I'm at the end of week 9 of my 10 week long half marathon training. The is down in DC next Saturday the 21st of March. I'm excited about it. I'm excited because I'm looking forward to seeing if I can get under the 2 hour mark. I'm also excited because I really miss riding my bike. That's something I really haven't been able to do much, partly because of the weather but mostly because of my training. I plan to start to ride to work again the week after the run.

I found out that you can't wear headphones during the Half, which kinda sucks. That's actually the main thing I'm worried about as music really helps me not focus so much on the run and pass the time.

I have one more longer training run of 8 miles this Saturday and I plan to not wear headphones just to see how it goes. I want to mimic what it will be like the day of the race as best I can.

So yeah, back to riding my bike after the run, although I did sign up for a 10 mile Broad Street run the first week of May. That will be nice to keep me in decent running shape until then.

I like to keep myself busy and keep setting clear goals that are exercise oriented. I've found that as long as I have something to focus on that I'm interested in I'm good. It's when I'm floating around in no-mans-land, just randomly trying to stay in shape where I look back and realize I had not worked out for 2 weeks. I don't know how some people just fit in workouts when they can randomly. That would never work for me. I do know that everyone is different and you have to work with your schedule...

Lastly , about my last post; I do realize I came across a bit harsh and probably a bit like a dick, and I am sorry I seem to have offended some people, but I still stand by what I said. I only say it because I know I spent YEARS blaming my "self issues" on outside things. It wasn't until I took accountability for them that I could take control. In the end I just want everyone to know that my intentions in that post were good regardless of how they may have come across. I hate to see people fail and find themselves unhappy with themselves, especially when they know what they're capable of. I also understand everyone has their issues and there is no one formula for everyone.
Sometimes people just need a kick in the ass though. Call me insensitive or short sighted if you must.

OK, that's it, I'm blabbering. I hope everyone is well, doing what makes you happy. That is all.

Later